Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Happy Happy Joy Joy

My beautiful friend Amy posted this article about giving up things to be happy. http://www.purposefairy.com/3308/15-things-you-should-give-up-in-order-to-be-happy/

It's actually a lovely article.  If it's true I must have sunshine coming out my butt because I am the happiest person ever.  Behold: 

1- Give up your need to always be right. 
"Do you want a blue or a pink cup?"
"Pink"
Handed pink 
"NO!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!! AAAAAAGGGHHH THAT IS NOT PINK!"
"Yes it is. That color is pink." 
"NO ITS NOT!"
"Oh. Okay it's not"

2- Give up our need for control.
I can't even control my own bladder completely anymore. I control nothing. Seriously. Nothing. 

3- Give up on blame.
"Why is the dog food strewn all about the house?"
"She did it"
"She did it"
"Fenway did it"

4- Give up your self-defeating self talk. 
Done. They are all alive.  I rock. 

5- Give up your limiting beliefs.
I do not believe one small human can ruin an entire room before I'm done peeing. False. 
I do not believe I can exist on less than 2 hours of sleep a night for months. 
False. 
I do not believe 3 small people can drive you completely and utterly out of your mind just by whining. Forever and about everything for weeks on end. 
False. 

6- Give up complaining
Never. What the hell would I post on facebook then?

7- Give up the luxury of criticism
Pre-kids: Oh I would never let the kids watch hours of tv. 
Post-kids: PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS HOLY JUST WATCH A MOVIE AND STOP TALKING.

Pre-kids: Oh I MIGHT let the kids have McDonalds once. That's it. 
Post-kids: Who wants nuggets for the 5th night this week? Whatever you will actually eat!

Pre-kids: Oh my god I would never use a leash. 
Post-one trip to ikea with 2 year olds: LOCK THEM UP!  USE STRAIGHT JACKETS I DONT CARE. 

Pre-kids: I cannot believe they are letting the kid just sit there in the aisle and cry. 
Post-kids: Cool. Have fun with your tantrum. I'll be in the frozen food section when your done. Don't get kidnapped. I don't have time for that shit today. We have to go to the bank. 

I could go on... and on and on...

8- Give up your need to impress others. 
I don't even bother wearing pants in the house anymore. I change my shirt like every three days. 

9- Give up your resistance to change
I used to have a job. I used to speak to grown-ups on a daily basis about things other than poop. I used to enjoy going to the movies and eating out. I used to stay up late going out on the town.  I used to wear makeup. CHANGE. 

10- Give up labels
"What is that? No seriously I don't even know what that substance is let alone how it got here.  GIIIIIRLS!"

11- Give up on your fears
Do NOT jump from that high! Noooooohhh too late. 

I'm scared you'll hurt yourself if you play with that knife. Oh, it's a different knife.  Great. 

Why would you TRY and pull that dresser over on top of yourself.

It worries me when you climb that.

I give up. I. Give. Up. 

12- Give up your excuses (Stop lying to yourself)

"There's a reason we were late. It won't happen again."
Eh, actually there's no good reason. I'll never be on time for anything again. 
 
"Sorry the house is a mess. I haven't had a chance to pick up after lunch" or breakfast or last night's dinner or ever really. This is just my house now. Suck it. 

"Ya know, she just doesn't feel well today so that's probably why she is acting like that." Ehhhh she is 2 and kindof a dick. I'm working on it. It's going poorly. 

13- Give up the past. 
I think we sufficiently covered this in 9. 

14- Give up attachment. 
"That was my favorite blanket/ring/dvd/couch/carpet/moment of solitude. Why would you kill it? Why?"

15- Give up living your life to other peoples expectations.
"You should really only use organic produce" Or walmart. 
"You should really brush their hair" I mean, YOU can. Good luck. 
"You should really workout." No. 
"Skinny feels better than chocolate tastes." I'll take your portion!  Grazi. 
"You shouldn't let them play on that" Probably but I'm going to anyway. 
etc
etc
etc


Really though, it's true. I am so very happy with my kids.  Happier than I would ever be without them. We humans give up a lot to have children and while I'm the first to admit that it isn't worth it every minute of the day, it's totally worth it when all is said and done.  

3 comments:

  1. Oh, wow. I am quietly wheezing and trying not to laugh too loud for fear of waking my little tyrant. There are tears. Oh, wow. This is my life.

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    Replies
    1. Love it. Isn't that how we all LOL, just breathe real loudly at the computer? ha.

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  2. So I found your blog from a post on Gilbert Friends about a fundraiser for your family. I am so sad to hear about what your family must be going through at this time. But completely unrelated, I could see myself in every single comment you made in this post. It is all so perfectly true. Kids change everything! Thank you for sharing. Sending hugs and prayers to your family.

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